Who knows?

so maybe i'm in a mood.

maybe i'm just that girl right now.

maybe its all justified. but i have this recurring feeling and i dont know where i am.

maybe i miss my sisters.

maybe i wanna go back to senior year just because i had a boy, 7 beautiful girls, an amazing family, and i thought things were good.

but i didnt have what i have now.

i didnt know what i was missing.

things werent great.

now i have good friends who dont understand. awesome people in my life, who will never get it. they werent there when i went through everything. my family was. and my sisters were.

and now they're in illinois, michigan, virginia, minnesota, ohio, idaho, pennsylvania.

maybe i'm just lonely again.

but why does it keep coming to this?

things go great.

God is good and no words can explain how good.

but its simple and beautiful and He continually gives me things i dont need.

so where is the gratefulness?

why does this lonely feeling keep coming back?

maybe God is trying to tell me something.

He's the ONLY One who will ever completely get me.

He knows.

He knows these feelings, and thank The Lord, that's true. because that means i'm not crazy.

for now.

maybe He wants me to turn to Him first and not to some random someone who doesnt wanna listen to me complain.

maybe i'm supposed to be at the place where i'm so lonely, all i can do is turn to The Most High, Comforter and Healer.

maybe I'm right where i should be, and dont even know it.

Thank You, Lord. for never sighing and walking away because I'm being ridiculous.

Thank You for always listening even when i'm not talking to You.

Thank You for completely understanding.

Thank You, Lord for commenting even when i'm not listening.

Thank You for knowing me even when i dont know me.

Thank You, Lord for being called and living up to the name "Healer" and "Comforter".

Thank You.

so come one.

comfort me.

even tho i dont deserve it.

heal me.

because i feel broken.

and Thank You

and to You is all the praise.

because YOU are LORD over ALL.